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Living the Dream



I want to be a singer.

{After watching ABC's In the Spotlight With Robin Roberts: All Access Nashville last night I'm totally thinking country music}

It's true, no matter how cheesy it may sound.  Ever since I was a little girl I wanted nothing more than to grow up one day and sing for a career.  I have memories of standing in my grandmother's kitchen, tape player in the middle of the floor, belting out Mariah Carey's MTV Unplugged album.  When I closed my eyes I was pretty sure it was me standing on the stage.

I liked writing my own songs.  I had one of those big keyboards that you could press a button and it would play a song for you, and I used that to write a song for my mom on one of her birthdays.  I even roped one of my good friends into singing it with me.

I was even willing to put the effort into choreography for a good performance.  Elementary school talent show?  Totally choreographed a dance to Mariah's Fantasy.  I still remember some of the moves (but I'm not going to prove it).

I participated in choir every opportunity I got, whether it be church or school.  I even had solos in some of our performances.  As I got older I took on singing "special performances" on Sundays at church.  (You Baptists out there know what I'm talking about. "Special performances" were/are a time in the church service where someone can get up and sing a song of their choice.)  At one of our church youth camps I even got to sing in front of a few hundred people, including Chris Tomlin, who patted me on the back and told me I did a good job, but unfortunately didn't offer me any contracts.  Oh well, maybe next time. I also got to sing a line of Big House with Audio Adrenaline once, but that's a different story that I need to find the picture to before I share. :)

Anyhoo, all that to say I've always wanted to sing.  At my old, ripe age of 25 I'm starting to realize that's probably not the path set out for my life, professionally anyway.

You see, I realized something a couple of years ago, and was reminded of it again yesterday and thought I would share to encourage you where you might be today.  I love to sing, passionately love to sing, and even at one point thought God might be calling me to use that passion for Him.  For years I wondered if I had that strong of a passion for singing why wasn't God using me in that way, why wasn't he giving me ways to develop my voice for Him, and why would He give me that passion in the first place.

Then one night when I held a crying little baby boy and didn't know what else to do, I sang.

And he stopped crying.  And there was peace.

And another time when he was crying I even made up my own little song for him that I would sing when I didn't know what else to do to help him calm down, and every time I sang it he would stop crying.  I might've had to sing through it a few times, but it always worked.  I've even pulled it out a couple of times with our youngest.  It's very basic and nothing impressive, completely made up on the fly, but it works.

So, in those first moments of singing to my little baby boy I felt like God was saying "See, I didn't give you that passion for no reason.  You're using it for your most important task, being the mom I've called you to be."  That might not seem big to you, but it was bigger than life to me.  There is no one in this world I would rather make happy with my singing than my baby boys.

And we sing. A lot.  My oldest now likes to sing 3 songs before bed every night, and they're always the same ones in this order: Jesus Loves Me, Twinkle Twinkle Little Star, and a song from the Wiggles (Random I know).  The Wiggles song we just kinda make up the words because I have no idea how their song really goes, but I think that's one reason he likes it, because we just have fun with it.

So, while I may not be singing for any sold-out auditoriums any time soon, I'm ok with knowing God is using my passion for an amazing purpose - showing love to my sweet boys.

And, I still occasionally bust out some old-school Mariah.  Loved. Her.

Have you had any passions that you didn't get to use the way you thought you would?  I would love to hear about it in the comments.
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2 comments:

  1. You have GOT to stop making me tear up at work. Britt - this is such a sweet post and such a testament to the amazing mother you are! Every word is SO true... the childhood dreams of becoming famous someday probably won't happen, but the people who matter most will think we're total superstars (at least until they're teenagers!).

    P.S. I thought I would FOR SURE become a ballerina when I grew up. I had big plans of moving to Paris and dancing through Europe. Too bad I only grew to be 5'2"... and, oh yea, I have hips. =)

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  2. This is a great post idea!! I really wanted to tap dance when I was a little girl. My mom couldn't afford lessons. Such a loss for me. Remembering this makes me want to make sure my boys are able to pursue any dream they have (within finacial reason ;)) Thanks Brittany!

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