Just Do Something

Dear friends, I've been struggling lately. I've sat down to write to you many times with no success in sight.

I'd sit. I'd stare. I'd daydream. I'd watch the Olympics. I'd check Facebook. I'd check Twitter. I'd eat a Snickers {I don't even like Snickers that much}. Oh yeah, and I'd take care of my first priority, those cute little guys I call my boys.

This is starting to sound like one of those "I'm about to quit blogging for good" posts... It's not. It's more of a "I have this passion and no idea what to do with it" post. Will someone please tell me I'm not the only one who ever feels that way? Like you have a passion, maybe even what you would call a "gift," but you have no idea how to tackle it.

I'm a pretty insecure person, so there aren't many things I feel "gifted" in. There are plenty of things I wish I were gifted in and try my hand at, but not many things that I feel truly confident in. Writing is one of those few things. It's the easiest form of communication for me. I'm a deep thinker, so getting all the words out that are on my mind in a clear fashion comes easiest in the written form. In my current state of life, blogging is the easiest medium to use to keep up with this desire, but time, it's hard to come by when you have a family and a home to take care of.

I'm also a perfectionist. When I sit down to write I want all my other responsibilities completely taken care of. I want to have the perfect blog with the perfect name and the perfect words for that day. I want peace and quiet so I can think and have time to myself. {I think all of you moms out there know that this is a nearly impossible request.}

So, I'm left feeling overwhelmed and not doing anything. And this isn't just in blogging/writing. I've started entertaining the idea of getting a job, probably just part-time, but something to get me and the boys out of the house none-the-less. This isn't a new phenomenon, but something I haven't pursued completely because a) I'm afraid my worth in the "real world" would be pretty low after being a SAHM for 5 years and b) I'm completely scared of giving up this time with the boys. They're only young once, right?

It's also kept me from serving in my church because I just have no idea what to do. I finally emailed someone today and just asked them to tell me where there's a need because I just need to be doing something.

And that's what I'm doing today with this post... Something. It may not be the most moving of posts, but it's something, and something is better than nothing.

Yesterday in our message at church we read Luke 22:31-32 which says, "Simon, Simon, behold, Satan demanded to have you, that he might sift you like wheat, but I have prayed for you that your faith may not fail. And when you have turned again, strengthen your brothers."

I'm not saying Satan is separating me from blogging/writing, although he could be if there's something I have to share that would encourage and help others out there, but what I love about those verses was the part about helping others when you turn back to where you're suppose to be.

So this is me doing something, writing about how I've been struggling to write. And now I want to encourage you. What have you been struggling with lately? What do you feel like you're suppose to be doing? It doesn't have to be perfect. Just do something, anything, that will move you in the right direction.


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